The Daily Mail
IF you can keep your head and buy the Mail
When all about buy into left-wing lies
If you think that the Poles belong in jail.
And believe that Muslim’s come here just as spies.
If you think cancer’s caused by single mums
Or that gypsies jinx our mighty mortgage rate
If you think that young people are all scum
And there should be laws so they can’t masturbate.
If you believe binge drinkers can cause AIDS
And that there’s too much filth on our TV
Or the nanny state is turning our youth gay
OR immigrants steal the taxpayer’s money:
If you believe each word that’s in the Mail
You’re stupid beyond all measured scale.
Ashley Lister
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